Once I made it to the car (half asleep mind you), I collapsed inward (imploded) on the seat, after which, I had enough energy to keep my eyes open for a substantial amount of time. I noticed the weather was more or less decent today. We drove on this wildlife loop, which had a visitor center that was conveniently closed, but there were bathrooms, in fact an enclosed herd of bison, behind the bathrooms. The bison were pretty chill. You don’t annoy them, and they won’t murder you. Fair trade in my opinion. They had their reasons to hate humans, especially since American government basically ran them nearly extinct to get rid of the Native Americans. My advice, keep your distance if you want to live.
Then we saw the harmless donkeys. Now here are some facts about the word donkey, in Bengali, the word for donkey is also the word for idiot or stupid. Another fact, although this one is rated PG Christians only, or 11+. The Christians have a name for the donkey. As stated in the Bible, they are referred to as asses. Sorry if I’ve ruined donkeys for you, or not. Here comes my least favorite animal so far, the Prairie dogs. Granted, they’re probably not so bad as I make them seem (he who must not be named), but even though they are cute, they’re scientifically considered rodents. There’s also the fact of them using the bubonic plague as a defense mechanism, they also grab people’s attention because they do something like scratch their backs. Seriously, my dad fell for that one.
After the animal encounters, we started driving on our way to Wind Cave. My only entertainment would either be reading every book in my Kindle library for the who-knows-what time or watch the Black Hills. I chose a time-share. As if I needed more proof that there are still bison in South Dakota, we were intercepted by a Bison herd right before the entrance. Really. When the Bison jam ended, we made our way to the visitor center. I wish my parents would stop torturing me. I still don’t have a Lego set from any gift shop. To entertain myself, me and my dad asked the park Ranger to play the movie, which was displayed on a TV smaller than the one in our hotel room. Finally, our tour group was called up. We had to walk to a separate building just to get on the elevator. It was very originally called the elevator building. Our tour guide was telling us that the cave was not to be touched unless you were breaking a fall. No one blames you for saving your own life, right?
[God] Sin of Greed! BEGONE!
Wind cave was created when there was sulfuric acid carving its way through. Then the hills rose and the acid drained. Then carbonic acid continued to carve its way through. Then that receded. A bajillion years later, two people found Wind Cave. There was a small entrance. One threw his hat at the hole, and it was blown back at his face. The next day he brought more friends. He threw the hat at the entrance again, but this time it was sucked in. What happens is the air pressure inside Wind Cave is always higher or lower than the air pressure outside Wind Cave, so the entrance is either blowing out or taking in air to equalize the air pressure. The Native Americans said that Wind Cave was breathing. Personally, I’d like to think the cave won’t rise from the ground as a living beast, but you can never be sure. The Native Americans also have a story of creation based on this cave. They said that people were created inside Wind Cave and were told to stay inside until the world was ready. In other words, they were told to do exactly that. About half of them exited Wind Cave and survived pretty well. Until winter. This reminded me of a video of how the Soviet Union was laughing hysterically at the Third Reich in Moscow. Anyway, they called on their creator God to save them. He said he would save them but also punish them for disobeying his orders. They probably agreed so as not to die of hypothermia, he turned them into Buffalo. He also made Buffalo only need grass to survive. However, the punishment was that their brothers and sisters got to slaughter them over, and over again for food and other things. Seems fair right? You peek at the outside world and your creator God turns you into animals to be slaughtered by your own family indefinitely? No, that’s not psychotic at all.
Now let’s talking about the scientific explanation (that will make the natives go ballistic) of how Wind Cave formed, most of this I covered earlier, but there’s also some other stuff. First limestone builds up on the sea floor made up of compressed sea fossils. Next, freshwater seeps into the limestone cracks and becomes sulfuric acid (yes, that’s as dangerous as it sounds). The acidic water starts widening the cracks that it seeped into. Once the black hills rose, the water drained from the cave and Carbonic Acid replace it (no that isn’t as dangerous as it sounds, ever heard of soda?) and starts to widen the cracks even more, then it receded, and cave formations begin to grow. So, there’s a bit of geological history for you. It was fun learning about this stuff, but now we have to go on the most well-known (maybe 2nd most well-known) place in South Dakota. Time to enter Mount Rushmore National Memorial!
*Play dramatic orchestral music*
After a nightmarish parking experience, we entered the area. The first thing that we saw was the Avenue of the flags. The good news? No Canadian or Greenlandic flags (yet), the bad news? Georgia’s flag was the Confederacy flag with their seal slapped in the middle of the stars. We went to the Visitor Center, which was the size of the White House. Fine, not really, but it felt that way. I picked up a Junior Ranger booklet and with energizing speed, I finished it in 25 minutes. To give you a perspective, it usually takes 1-2 hours to finish. I gave it to a Ranger and got sworn in. Done, Record time! Time for some more history! Now, I’ve already said a lot about the mountain, but what about the presidents? Each president represents a specific part of United States story.
Foundation – George Washington, First President
Growth – Thomas Jefferson, the Louisiana Purchase
Preservation – Theodore Roosevelt, most active in the National Park Service
Development – Abraham Lincoln, won the Civil War for the Union
Then we did the deadly president’s trail. Why deadly? Did I forget to mention there were 425 STEPS ? We’re hiking a trail, not climbing Mount Rushmore! How did the sculptors go back and forth from the sculpture studio and mountain every morning ? I guess some mysteries will never be solved. Finally, we made our way back to the hotel. Stairs are my new worst enemy. See you tomorrow… that is, if I wake up and overcome my newfound phobia of stairs.